My babies

I want a baby. That's right, I want a baby. Unfortunately, you can't always have what you want. Having a baby for me is not like it is for most people. I can't just go off birth control and start trying. I can't expect to have insurance cover most of the cost of having a baby. I can't have kids. My husband also can't have kids. I have known since I was about 18 that in order for me to have a child I'll need a lawyer and about $30,000. 

So.... for now, I have babies of furry kind. One sweet spirit and one pretty boy.


This is our sweet spirit. Yes, we know she's not the best looking dog around, but she is the sweetest dog around. She was my 24th year birthday present. She's also a rescue. The reason I chose her was because while I was looking at her The lady kicked her and kicked her hard. We've had to love her out of her fear and anxiousness but she's wonderful. She's still very food anxious and you'd think we starve her even though she's always got food available to her and the first time I tried to clip her nails she got so scared she literally pooped her pants. I am happy to say that was the only time that happend.

She's a total lap dog. If there's a lap with in reach, she's in it. She like to curl up in whateve nook of yours that you'll let her curl up in.

She has an underbite and, like I said, we know she's not pretty, but spend a couple hours with her and she'll have you wrapped around her little paw.

This is my pretty boy. He's stuck up. His papered name is Inigo Montoya but Monty for short. My dad bought him for me and helped me name him. It was one of those, trying to buy my love times, you know. I must say, it totally worked.

Monty is my second love. (Brody was my first) I'll tell you, there is nothing like the unconditional love from these furry little guys.

He's pretty and the perfect speciman of a male chihuahua. Good blood lines, rare and pretty color and usually a good tempermant. Like I said, he's stuck up so he has an attitude sometimes.

We love him anyways and will always represent some wonderful, priceless memories with my dad.

I still want a baby though. Because I can't have one, I sometimes want another dog. Yes, I'm okay with being a crazy dog lady as long as I can't have babies. You are not allowed to judge unless you also can not have kids. Joy and Rebecca, I mean you. :-) Then my husband and my mom tell me I can't have anothe one and hurts my feelings. Yes, it hurts my feelings. I'm sick and I can't even have babies so let me have my dogs for petes sake. No, they're probably right but knowing that doesn't make me feel better.

What does make me feel better is when my puppies need me and I can help them. I don't feel so useless, you know. Last night my sweet sweet Fergie got stung by a scorpian. I of course called 2, 24 hour emergancy veterinary clinics. They told me to watch for an allergic reaction and comfort her. She still won't leave my side. It's pretty pathetic but it makes me feel good that I make her feel better. I can't kiss my daughter's or son's boo boo but I can hold and put a hot compress on my hurt puppy.