Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Next surgery

Hysterectomy and Oophorectomy Guide picks

Hysterectomy is the surgical removal of the uterus. In salpingectomy, the fallopian tubes are removed and in an oophorectomy, the ovaries are excised. Through the use of laparoscopic techniques, these lower abdominal surgeries in most instances can be performed transvaginally, eliminating the need for an abdominal incision.
These are what I am having done on Monday August 17. I am not scarred or nervous. I am relieved. Those parts of me do nothing but cause trouble and a whole lot of pain. The doctor even said that ONE of the reasons for my constant nausea could be from the constant, awful pain that those parts of me cause. So, wish me good luck.

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Conversation that is still bugging me.

I had a conversation the other day with my husbands brother that is still frustrating me.

He said that in his last church meeting the Bishop said that the woman in the ward were having a hard time with not being married and asked if they could think of anything they could do to help them not feel that way.

I totally understand that feeling. I was married one month short of 23 years old. I have 6 sisters and all were married by the age of 21. I felt like an old maid. I was ready to change a lot of things in order to have a better chance of getting married. Moving, changing hair, changing clothes, changing my body, all kinds of things. You see, I feel, that as woman we have very little control over whether or not we get married. It's all in the hands of the men.

My brother in law disagrees with that. He thinks it's all in our hands. We have to be happy no matter what and that means being happy alone. If we are positive then we will get married, the end. So stay positive. I disagree with this and I hate it.
Return missionaries know they can get married as soon as they are ready. For us women it is not so easy. Once we're ready the only thing we can do is try to live our lives as best we can while knowing that its second rate. Everything is second rate and marriage always stand in first place.
Why is marriage so important that we all have that as our first and foremost goal? Why did I feel old and why did I want to get married so badly? Because it a huge gospel principle and a huge part of our Heavenly Father's plan of Happiness.
Here is what Eldar Bednar had to say on the subject
Why Marriage Is Essential
In “The Family: A Proclamation to the World,” the First Presidency and Council of the Twelve Apostles proclaim “that marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God and that the family is central to the Creator’s plan for the eternal destiny of His children.” 2 This keynote sentence of the proclamation teaches us much about the doctrinal significance of marriage and emphasizes the primacy of marriage and family in the Father’s plan. Righteous marriage is a commandment and an essential step in the process of creating a loving family relationship that can be perpetuated beyond the grave.
The eternal nature and importance of marriage can be fully understood only within the overarching context of the Father’s plan for His children.
After the earth was created, Adam was placed in the Garden of Eden. Importantly, however, God said it was “not good that the man should be alone” (Gen. 2:18; Moses 3:18), and Eve became Adam’s companion and helpmeet. The unique combination of spiritual, physical, mental, and emotional capacities of both males and females were needed to implement the plan of happiness. Alone, neither the man nor the woman could fulfill the purposes of his or her creation.
By divine design, men and women are intended to progress together toward perfection and a fulness of glory. Because of their distinctive temperaments and capacities, males and females each bring to a marriage relationship unique perspectives and experiences. The man and the woman contribute differently but equally to a oneness and a unity that can be achieved in no other way. The man completes and perfects the woman and the woman completes and perfects the man as they learn from and mutually strengthen and bless each other. “Neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in the Lord” (1 Cor. 11:11; italics added).
We strive for it because it is necessary. Could our leaders make it any clearer?
Some of the most beautiful women I know are unmarried. And yes, they are in their mid twenties and even mid Thirties. Why are they still not married? Your guess is as good as mine.
However, my opinion is that the men of my generation have lost sight of what is important and that as women we know it. Our Heavenly Father created us to be emotional and sympathetic as well and Empathetic, in order to do our jobs here on earth as caretakers of new little spirits, well. Therefore, we are emotional, sympathetic and empathetic to your XY wants and needs. And now-a-days, those wants, in particular, SUCK!!!
You can help tremendously on this front. Telling yourself that you have no effect whatsoever is just another rationalization. I do think that wallowing because you don't date or have many love interests is also just a rationalization for not up to our potential as woman, though. Yes, marriage should be your primary goal but you can do so many other things. We are brilliant, sexy, emotional, sympathetic, empathetic, strong and daughters of a Heavenly Father who loves each and every one of us more then anything else. We can do amazing things. So, even if you can't use your wifely or motherly talents just yet, that doesn't mean your other talents can't be honed and perfected.

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

In my dreams

In my dreams I am the perfect mix of this woman.

She's gorgeous and makes being perfectly femanine look so easy and natural.

Dainty and poised at all times. Flirty and femanine at all times. Polite and perfectly old fashioned. I love it.

And this woman.
Dark and gorgeous.

She makes looking sexy, hot, strong, and %100 bootylicious at all times look so naturally easy.

She makes the most rediculous dance moves look totally sexy and the girl can drop it like its hot any time, any where.

She is also perfectly femanine.

Oh to live the dream. Wouldn't that be nice.

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Julie & Julia

My sister in law, Katie, happened to snag 4 tickets to the new movie Julie & Julia. She kindly gave me 2 of the tickets. Bryce said I should take my mom instead of him, which was very thoughtful. So, I did. My mom and I along with Katie and my mother in law all went and saw this movie. For FREE!!! Oh how I love sneak previews.

I must say that this is probably the best movie I've seen in a very long time. Years maybe. Brilliantly written, Hilariously funny, with wonderful acting and great casting.
Maryl Streep was, as always, amazing in her role and so so so much fun. She totally nailed Julia Child. Love her.

Amy Adams was also amazing. Her hair sucked throughout the entire movie but she was still purely delightful to watch.

Now, the women is this movie were great, however, the movie would have sucked hard without the men in their lives. Both had husbands. Both had realistic yet amazing husbands. In the movie anyways.

The movie would not be any good without the men supporting roles. And, they as well, were brilliantly cast. They make %50 of this movie. Women and men equally amazing in his movie. Which is great, I think.

Whoever the screenwriter was for this movie should do so many more movies. Writing for this years movies has been subpar. If you've seen 'Knowing' you know what I'm talking about. This movie is Hilarious. I laughed the whole time. But smart and well written hilarious. I recommend everyone see it. Even you men out there. I plan on owning it the day it comes out on video. It was soooo much fun. THANKS KATIE!!! And thank you sweet husband for thinking of me and letting my mother come along instead of you. It was sooo much fun and Because you haven't seen it I have an excuse to go again when it hits theaters. Woo Hoo.

Monday, July 6, 2009

My babies

I want a baby. That's right, I want a baby. Unfortunately, you can't always have what you want. Having a baby for me is not like it is for most people. I can't just go off birth control and start trying. I can't expect to have insurance cover most of the cost of having a baby. I can't have kids. My husband also can't have kids. I have known since I was about 18 that in order for me to have a child I'll need a lawyer and about $30,000. 

So.... for now, I have babies of furry kind. One sweet spirit and one pretty boy.

This is our sweet spirit. Yes, we know she's not the best looking dog around, but she is the sweetest dog around. She was my 24th year birthday present. She's also a rescue. The reason I chose her was because while I was looking at her The lady kicked her and kicked her hard. We've had to love her out of her fear and anxiousness but she's wonderful. She's still very food anxious and you'd think we starve her even though she's always got food available to her and the first time I tried to clip her nails she got so scared she literally pooped her pants. I am happy to say that was the only time that happend.

She's a total lap dog. If there's a lap with in reach, she's in it. She like to curl up in whateve nook of yours that you'll let her curl up in.

She has an underbite and, like I said, we know she's not pretty, but spend a couple hours with her and she'll have you wrapped around her little paw.

This is my pretty boy. He's stuck up. His papered name is Inigo Montoya but Monty for short. My dad bought him for me and helped me name him. It was one of those, trying to buy my love times, you know. I must say, it totally worked.

Monty is my second love. (Brody was my first) I'll tell you, there is nothing like the unconditional love from these furry little guys.

He's pretty and the perfect speciman of a male chihuahua. Good blood lines, rare and pretty color and usually a good tempermant. Like I said, he's stuck up so he has an attitude sometimes.

We love him anyways and will always represent some wonderful, priceless memories with my dad.
I still want a baby though. Because I can't have one, I sometimes want another dog. Yes, I'm okay with being a crazy dog lady as long as I can't have babies. You are not allowed to judge unless you also can not have kids. Joy and Rebecca, I mean you. :-) Then my husband and my mom tell me I can't have anothe one and hurts my feelings. Yes, it hurts my feelings. I'm sick and I can't even have babies so let me have my dogs for petes sake. No, they're probably right but knowing that doesn't make me feel better.
What does make me feel better is when my puppies need me and I can help them. I don't feel so useless, you know. Last night my sweet sweet Fergie got stung by a scorpian. I of course called 2, 24 hour emergancy veterinary clinics. They told me to watch for an allergic reaction and comfort her. She still won't leave my side. It's pretty pathetic but it makes me feel good that I make her feel better. I can't kiss my daughter's or son's boo boo but I can hold and put a hot compress on my hurt puppy.

Thursday, July 2, 2009

Lake trip

My wonderful friend, Josh, has a boat. He had the day off on Thrusday so he invited a few of us, who also had Thursday off, to take a trip to the lake. I went but made it very clear to everyone that they should not prressure me to try to get up on anything. I puke enough as it is. They were all very nice. I swam , chilled on the boat and got lots of pictures.

This is the sweetest shot of the day. Josh.

Mine and Hailee's legs. She's a life guard and has naturally awesome olive skin anyway. Not only do I glow in the dark but my leg is also like 3 times bigger then hers. Still an awesome day.

This is my sister in law, Katie. She rocked it on the wake board.

Hailee and Shelby.

Todd. He's probably my second favorite man in my life. After my husband, of course.
Hailee. She climb up on the tower. So, naturally, I took a picture of her butt.
All the girls and Todd.
All the girls and Josh.

Me and Todd.

Me and Hailee.
And just me.
I had so much fun. I decided to take a spin on the intertube. On the drive home, I got fuzzy headed when I stepped out of the truck and twisted my ankle. It was still totally worth it. I loved it. Thanks Josh!!